issue 4 12-12-12
This week begins with the news that ex-Italian PM and hair specialist, Silvio Berlusconi returns from the political wilderness, (although he never really left) like that mysterious thing at the bottom of the recycling bin the collectors refuse to take away for reasons known only to them.
Luckily though, a Canadian wanker ( sorry auto-spell check, should read “Banker”) has been promoted to the English Premier league of Bad Debt and Money Printing, inspiring a new UKIP crusade against all things with foreign accents.
Of course the big news this week has been the Chancellor’s budget, miracling thousands of pounds in tax savings each year for the life of this parliament (if you happen to be a millionaire) while urging restraint upon the deserving poor as they await the shit storm of misery about to be unleashed this coming April (otherwise known as “Universal Credit”).
The government advises – especially at this time of year – that poverty is a state of mind, that you have to be cruel to be kind, and that sometimes you have to stomp on those on the breadline.
While the CofE gets itself in more of a tizz over same sex marriages (“why can’t they be satisfied with second class partnerships!” said one male bishop in a deep voice ) and personal relationships take a seasonal turn for the worse in overruled Britannia.
That’s it for now, and remember:
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