After succeeding in the Olympian feat of staging the Olympics, Russian foreign policy strategists have suggested that the solution to global warming and the melting of ski slopes is the invasion the country next door. While considering a bid to hold the summer Olympics in Siberia circa 2030 because of rising global temperatures, Russia’s new bare chested bareback riding power Tsar has extended the hand of war to it’s neighbour on the edge of “Urup”
UKIP supremo ended the conference season on a high, extolling the virtues of plain english as he shouted at everyone else in the country so they could “UNDERSTAND WHAT I’M SAYING!” as he battled for attention with loveable mop-topped Boris, the spidery Top Man at the tower of London. Boris says that religion is child abuse, and care should be taken in removing children from dangerous environments, such as the homes they are brought up in. Boris hopes this will promote his bid for world domination as he shifts up from Mayoral duties to having tea with the Queen as Prime Minister of all he surveys.
It has begun to dawn on citizens of every income bracket that the pension funds making billions from buying up businesses and firing everyone before dividing up the company, and putting most of it into receivership have no interest in paying people back the money they have put in over their years of saving for retirement.
Gold plated pension are having the gold they are plated with scratched off and melted down to make offshore hedge funds where the money disappears faster than a Japanese Bit-coin exchange. The remaining zinc alloy pensions are only good for making matchbox size toy car models of the automobiles pensioners had been dreaming they would be able to drive around in after they retired.
The 4th Politoon cartoon caption contest will open this week, ( congrats to Tim in Illinois for winning the third contest) so sharpen those i-pads, clean up those blackberry keys, and dust off that touch screen – it could be you!
Check out the upcoming exhibition in Falmouth