Latest polling data shows polls would win if enough polls register to vote!
Pollsters are generating newsfeeds suggesting that the polls could win a landslide in the coming general election wiping out mainstream parties in a bonfire of the infernos not seen since the idea of asking people what they think about things was first recorded. History shows that predicting how things will go before they have come and gone is an exciting area for unpaid interns and data collection experts in general who are prepared to keep annoying people until they submit to questioning.
Computer crash alert as Microsoft tells everyone to buy the latest version of its Faulty operating system
Software giant’s clients in hacking sh*t storm as Bill -Ransom-Gate faces down anonymous cyber-bots!
Philanthropic philanderer Big Bill Gates says he is ready for a showdown with unknown Dark Net users after North Korea threatens to launch missile strike on Ransom Net HQ somewhere in a wi fi hotspot near you.
more news to be made up shortly…