Politoons – the second coming or ‘rehash’ issue, and cartoon competition results!

Breaking News: Graffiti Art found on Street as opposed to inside Museums!politoons-new-logo1-940-198-72

A Bansky artwork was stolen by it’s owners and its USP doubled in size overnight as predictive texts around the world broke down causing #/ tweeting chaos!

Ban Kee moon, Badly, Bradley, and even Chelsea (as in Manning) kept cropping up in insipid but stupidly popular twitter feeds about art litter, as smart phones continue to dumb down in price toward their lowest common denominator (which in computer binary code means nothing)politoons manning case by macd

Ukraine train of thought derailed by Ethnical-ist times table Divisionspolitoons-new-logo1-940-198-pink-72

Meanwhile in trade talks between the US Empire and the Russian Re-Tsarist Movement, similar graffiti art by glorified cartoonists has become a bargaining chip in the increasingly heated debate about what to do with the Ukraine (both sides being afraid to ask Ukrainians what to do for fear of what they might think).putin and the hobby horse

The New Society is the Old Social Darwinismpolitoons-new-logo1-940-198-green-72citizenshil tests in the uk by macd

The British government has slashed, burned – and now effectively made extinct – support funding for disabled students in higher education, saying that Universities as opposed to society should foot the bill. “There is no such thing as society!” said several dead ghosts of Tories past, along with the minister for rubbish collections and faith-based elitism who went on to explain ““society” cannot pay for anything because “society” simply does not exist! Besides which, this government wasn’t not elected in order to make one!” The Rubbish Minister promptly left the room with a smug look on his faeces, and prepared for his next encounter with the domesticated media: a press conference on the subject of shooting people who might be immigrants. A plan the government is proposing in order to alleviate the Arrivals and Departures crisis currently taking place at Heathrow Airport.

mad men by macd

Music News is the same as it was 40 years ago study finds!

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Aging rock stars turned out in force to deny, and then confirm, rumours that they would be headlining at Glastonbury Festival this year. Some threatening to come out of retirement, and others threatening to return from the dead (This is understood to refer to the “Grateful Dead” a San Franciscan free love band famous for powerful rock ballads such as “Drums in Space” who managed to continue living like hippies well into the 21st century)

Bad Hair Day causes International Interventionismnext-of-kim-macd-21-12-11webpolitoons-new-logo1-940-198-pink-72

World leader’s selfie culture took on a new look this week as holograms of Kim Il Sun’s son, Kim Il Schlemiel appeared in Hair salons across Britain. Ambassadors for the smallest nuclear power in Korea duly arrived at the stylists shop in force, requesting pudding bowl cuts and some hair gel before insisting that the hologram of their great leader be removed from the cutting room floor (a common editing process in the North Korean countryside, where cuts and removal have different connotations)

The good news is that the Politoons exhibition of cartoons and sound continues at Jam Records in Falmouth UK until April 30th, and you can order any cartoon you like as a glicee print or on a dishwasher safe coffee cup for £10! (+p&p)IMG_1956

So get in touch to get that special something for that special someone on that special someday from this special somewhere today!

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And finally after much deliberation, hesitation, and repetition, we are able to announce the winner of the 4th Politoons Cartoon competition*!

(see below)

*sorry about the delay, it took a while before the brain transplant became fully functional, and kicking the crystal meths addiction took a bit longer than I had previously thought – my (breaking) bad.

We had some great lines from Tim,

“What, you act like you’ve never seen a mobile home before!”

and

“Now, that’s what I call rent control!”

with a wry comment on the state of modern art from the artist Chris,

“If he can draw a dog, why can’t he do heads?”

so the choice was difficult, and thank you to all who took the time to send in your brilliant ideas, but the final winner of competition #4 is PG’s,

“Nobody was impressed by Fido’s tortoise impression”

Nobody was impressed by Fido's tortoise impression

Nobody was impressed by Fido’s tortoise impression

Yers

MacD

Editor in Mischief

politoons.co.uk

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Yer politoon Easter massage

politoons-new-logo1-940-198-blue-sm Easter messageeaster-message1macd-sm

sorry about the delay in getting out the cartoon competition winners

here’s the link and we’ll be back after the break

cheers

macd

editor-in-belief

Posted in comedy, politoons, satire | 1 Comment

From the back of beyond

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Hi! I face tweeted the bebo we googled and amazoned u an orange apple blackberry app for tumblr that makes it easier to search for eye candy crowdsourcing of flash mobbed downloads on eBay. So I ‘/#’d’ it for you and took a selfie of the touchscreen pasted it to your inbox and had to resend it because of yur spam filter. Then the server was down, I had low battery with no charge cable so I mms-ed it to ur fone think it’s special offer – I only get one free if you and 9 others do the online q and a – can I bcc your email list? I saved it that time you put everyone in the subject field by mistake. I’ve sent them stuff before but as I might win something this time I thought I should tell you. :)

“What about the Cartoon Caption Contest?” I hear you say, even as the earth warms uncomfortably, shifting in its celestial seat.
Well, here’s the Cartoon in search of a Caption:dog-bus-stop-macd-sm

Don’t forget to check out and into The Enigma Deviations at Jam Records in Falmouth, on show until April 30th.

And there’s a whole heap a’ entries, but still a few days left.
Winning announcement at the end of the week.
Sorry about the delay folks, the ed’s been working on a short film- um, still i’s actually – so what the hey am I doing here! Gotta go, director’s cut on the clipboard! Xmacd

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Budget Plane Disappearing in Paper Boy Cuts Special!

politoons-new-logo1-940-198-72Budget Squeezes Middle-Aged Waistbandsgeorge-floats-the-pound-by-macd2013.jpg

Chancellor boy George unveiled his new tattoo, a heavily overwritten display of prime numbers cascading from a small calculator which when he flexed his bicep grew to the size of a small calculator.  Balls of Ire, the shadow of the Chancellor spoke ill of the dead, well Maggie anyway, then tried to encourage young people to vote saying he could feel their pain, having only recently just scraped through his year three piano exam himself.  Yes the mouth that launched a thousand blips was drowned beneath a sea of hate figures on the government benches today as they hailed themselves and their ‘we’ll have to make do with him for the time being’ leader. Meanwhile waves of Ukrainian boat people did not flood across Europes unprotected Eastern flank like the charge of the Light brigade thundering in the opposite direction over 100 years ago, “but it was a close run thing” said experts given air time to say such things.

Is it a bird, is it a…what the hell is that?falling-euro-macd_web

Missing planes in the Straights of Malay were meanwhile considering the possibility that they were being looked for in the wrong place.  So a team comprised of the Gays of Malay were instead sent into space to search for satellites that should have noticed where the flight had gone long before it had stopped going where it was supposed to. Arrival lounges in airports around the world were put on hold in case the plane showed up and everyone aboard had to be told that they could not disembark. “Plane people are the new boat people especially in Australia” said some Village people recently at a premier of ‘Priscilla in the desert –the director’s cut’. It is rumoured that even the original inhabitants of the worlds largest island can’t get rid of the alien creatures that for hundreds of years have overseen their asylum seekers hostels and rampaged like copulating rabbits through their corridors of power.

Paper boys face cuts in Puberty Timewhen the wind blows-macd

Meanwhile  in local news, the newspapers were delivered late again this morning as the usual child labourer has reached puberty and is now deemed fit for work.  Having been chucked out of the family home so they can rent out the spare room and pay the bedroom tax. The young ex- paper person is now forced to sleep in the rough until he becomes old enough to go to uni, where he can borrow ridiculous amounts of money and learn how to get out of paying it back.

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Don’t forget to check out and into The Enigma Deviations at Jam Records in Falmouth, and stay tuned for the finalists of the 4th POlitoon Caption Contest being announced this week!

Posted in comedy, mac dunlop cartoons, politoons, satire, US Politics, world politics | 1 Comment

The 4th Politoons Caption Contest

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With nerves a janglin’ and hearts a pumpin’ it’s time for lift off with the write stuff!

Pass the pencil, jotting pad and predictive text touch pads to release your inner funny bone! Here’s the Cartoon in search of a Caption:dog-bus-stop-macd-sm

The winner will receive a signed glicee print of this cartoon complete with their winning caption, so good luck to everyone!

here’s an honours list of

Previous Contest Winners

contest #3 was a tough battle of the one liners, but Tim from Antioch, Illinois in the good ol’ USA came through in the end with this little number:

3rd-caption-winner-mdthen there’s Steve from London, UK who parked his words on the double lines in contest #2

tyres-macd-s-campbell-sm

and the #1 Politoons contest was heralded as an unqualified success when Alysa all the way from Toronto CA  made the typists quiver with excitement here at Politoons. woman-cat-macd-ag-capt-sm

Check out all the winners, runners up from the previous contests here in the caption contest archives.

And so, to Enter:

Simply enter your name, email, and caption for the 3rd contest cartoon in the comment or contact boxes below.

For Further Research have a look at some of these links

Some ‘thoughts on cartooning’ from the Politoons art desk can be found here, and if you want to know more about other cartoon caption competitions , try these: the new yorker, the boston globe, the humor times politoons very first caption contest

want to make your online life easier? Click on the Follow button or RSS feed option for Politoons on the right of your screen, and get it delivered straight to your inbox.

REMEMBER!

macds world of humor

and if you want to find out more, or purchase anything, or have a question or comment, do get in touch

thanks for checking out the Third Politoons  Cartoon Caption Challenge! cheers, macd

if you like it, you’re welcome to share

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OMG Nothing about the Oscars – WTF?

politoons-new-logo1-940-198-blue-smCold War Resumed in attempt to Combat Global Warmingantarctic-dump-macd-sm

After succeeding in the Olympian feat of staging the Olympics, Russian foreign policy strategists have suggested that the solution to global warming and the melting of ski slopes is the invasion the country next door. While considering a bid to hold the summer Olympics in Siberia circa 2030 because of rising global temperatures, Russia’s new bare chested bareback riding power Tsar has extended the hand of war to it’s neighbour on the edge of “Urup”

Farage Fiddles as Boris Burnsfarage-macd

UKIP supremo ended the conference season on a high, extolling the virtues of plain english as he shouted at everyone else in the country so they could “UNDERSTAND WHAT I’M SAYING!” as he battled for attention with loveable mop-topped Boris, the spidery Top Man at the tower of London. Boris says that religion is child abuse, and care should be taken in removing children from dangerous environments, such as the homes they are brought up in. Boris hopes this will promote his bid for world domination as he shifts up from Mayoral duties to having tea with the Queen as Prime Minister of all he surveys.

Pension Piddle Proves Punishment for Plebsyou-keep-it-macd-sm

It has begun to dawn on citizens of every income bracket that the pension funds making billions from buying up businesses and firing everyone before dividing up the company, and putting most of it into receivership have no interest in paying people back the money they have put in over their years of saving for retirement.

Gold plated pension are having the gold they are plated with scratched off and melted down to make offshore hedge funds where the money disappears faster than a Japanese Bit-coin exchange. The remaining zinc alloy pensions are only good for making matchbox size toy car models of the automobiles pensioners had been dreaming they would be able to drive around in after they retired.

The 4th Politoon cartoon caption contest will open this week, ( congrats to Tim in Illinois for winning the third contest) so sharpen those i-pads, clean up those blackberry keys, and dust off that touch screen – it could be you!

Check out the upcoming exhibition in Falmouth

enigma-variations600wand remember, the world of humour needs you!

obsession-man-29-01-12macd

Posted in climate, economy, politoons, world politics | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Delivery Drones, Films about Plastic Bricks, Olympian Sex and More Rain!

politoons-new-logo1-940-198.jpgAmazin’ drones on about privatizing clouds!varble-intrst-rates-macd-sm

Having successfully cornered the market in online corner markets, Jeb “Bdeep-Bdeep-Bdeep” Gazebo, MDMA of Amazon.con has revealed secret talks with the CIA which will take the online retailer to the next level in the hit video game “Spy for your country”.

Amazin – the online website behemoth rivaling Googoo for being visible from virtual space – are recruiting a new team of  air heads to administer ECG shock treatment to first time users still expecting something for free without first having to hand over all their government’s personal data.

Other Drone Updates released!politoons-new-logo1-940-198-pink-72us president barrack obama by macd

Holier than though victims of the Obama-nated war on terror in the eyes of the beholder have taken the tragedy of 7-11 and the rise of 24hour news coverage as a sign that there is no smoking without fire in the sprinkler systems of power.  Using trickle down technology that has kept pace with the flight of capital from people’s pockets, military sources say privatization of their industry will keep water in people’s taps, and tree shaped air-fresheners in citizens cars for all eternity – unless world temperatures rise by 2 degrees Celsius.

Lego Film Logo Embargo!politoons-new-logo1-940-198-green-72

A Lego Man -whose starring role in the new hit film “Brick by Brick 2” now haunts the imagination of many children across the world – was quoted as saying “ I’m no Brad Pitt, but I can attach myself to lots of different bit parts, and stand emotionless in front of cameras for quite some time before needing someone to change the position of my arms or legs”.

there-are-many-mdAir strikes over flood plane areas continued to ridicule people who live in flood plains, and the environmental experts who are blamed for too much rain by people who claim “I’m no expert, but…” have not been given access to social media to repudiate the un-experts claims. Even government ministers have backtracked through the rising tides of sewage clogging up the toilets in the British houses of parliament, and blamed the latest natural disasters on Yes voters in the forthcoming Scottish Referendum f Doom.

you-keep-it-macd-smMoney changes hands as buskers seek new ways to attract dwindling numbers of street walkers!

Straight Sex Olympics!politoons-new-logo1-940-198-blue-sm

apres-skis-macd-smThe west looked on as Russian demagogs slid down ski slopes made of gay people and handed medals out to others who hid their personal opinions behind a shroud of athleticism and pride in their nation’s desperate desire for media coverage.  In a disputed place with disreputable conditions, impartial national observers were encouraged to cheer on their team members while human rights were flaunted to a degree previously not imagined in the 21st century.

Party Line Services reintroduced for National Newspapers in UK!

Phone hacking has come under fire in recent years for allowing journalists to listen into people’s privacy settings previously the preserve of government advertising executives.early eye phone by macd

With several media celebrities being charged with listening in on the conversations of others, national telecoms giant B(U)T has announce the reintroduction of shared communication provision which will make sharing privacy much simpler for regularly ripped off customers.

tune in for our next Cartoon Caption contest coming next week! congratulations again to Tim from Illinois for his winning by-line below!

3rd-caption-winner-mdfollow Politoons for more and more and more and more and…

Posted in business, climate, economy, modern memes by macd, politoons, satire, social commentary, sports, US Politics, world business | Leave a comment