Deathism is worse than Ageism says UK Government Dogsbody
Government fink tank experts are predicting a future that will unleash untold riches for the untold rich. Fighting against red tape red corbyn and red till your dead doorknobs, Prime Meanster B. Johnson has enlisted the powers of the dead to propose a bold new perspective on the idea that you work til you drop without a break for tea, lunch retirement or even your own funeral. “Afterlife profits have been overlooked for too long in this country! My government is proposing not to prolong retirement, but instead to promote afterliving! This is a government that wants to support citizens who take pride in their work and don’t necessarily want to stop working just because of dying! ThevNew Ageism is something that Brexit will allow us to achieve without the namby pamby celestial rule makers in Brussels getting in the way of the desire of the British people to work themselves to death, and to have the right to carry on!.”
Realtor President to buy Greenland
A prime military landscape is in the pipeline and ready for the exchange of contracts with Trump Partners once the offer you can’t refuse has been confirmed.
(Actually, I don’t think this is a joke. ed)
Hong Kong running out of Umbrellas
Having become the symbol of resistance against the Party run state of China, HK now finds that every available umbrella is being used in protest against the Party franchise government of Hong Kong. It never rains but it pours says HK’s leading brelly manufacturer. China maintains that HK doesn’t need umbrellas, and should comply with un-umbrella culture traditions in line with the state controlled state of the mainland.
Germany’s Recession Proof Quantum Easing
One of the highlights of being European is taking comfort in the stability of the German economy. Even the recent shakes of Merkel have not shaken confidence in the german model (Angela recently made the cover of Vogue) So cars, diesel and otherwise are still the powerhouse behind the throne of Euro stability, and no, there will be no downturn, no uprising and no middle incomes as far as Deutchebank is concerned.
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